In a year
by blue-eyes-forever
Summary: ohh....i dont want to say who it is....butbut....oh if you read my last fic you'll know who it is lol. its sad and...sad ='(. btw...plz send more dave stories out pplz....


The song used is "A Year Ago Today"…one of my favorite songs ever. It's Delta Goodrem…I'm not sure how popular she is in the US but over here (Australia) she's our hero =). But we all pray she gets better soon…get better soon Delta: you will triumph over this…we love you!!!!!!! (realizes she's trailing off…) Ah right. I'm pretty sure its probably damn obvious what has happened although its not supposed to be (I'm never good with the subtlety thing…I'm working on it!) So enjoy everyone! 

**Disclaimer**: so I stole Delta (Goodrem)'s song.  And I've stolen characters from ER. What more have I got to lose??? THEYRE MINEEEE!!!! ALLLL mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *maniacal grin* oh...but please…if anyone's listening…PLEASE bring back Dave…he's still THE best reason for ER…even though he's gone…I don't know if anyone else suffers from this but I watch just in the hope he might appear again…lol no I'm not crazy. Ah. Right. The story. 

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_Another year older_

_A little bit stronger_

_A little bit wiser than_

_A year ago today…_

Looking out the window through the dusty grime onto the sky, she sighed and let her thoughts wander again. A year ago today…it seemed so long. A year ago today, he had broken her heart and left her there, all alone. Maybe that was just her luck with men…how they always seemed to leave her alone before she could get to know them, before they could get _somewhere_. Winter in County alone again. A year ago they had been so happy. Just beginning. After all his joking; his clichéd pick-up lines; everything about him that was so unlike her; she had fallen head over heels, hook-line and sinker in love with him. She had sworn she would never do something like that again, but he had been different…she thought there could finally be constancy, a chance at happiness, grasping the ever-fleeting dream. And so they had begun just over a year ago today, at what she thought would be forever….and yet a year later: today…

_Looking over my shoulder_

_I was so much younger then_

_I cant believe what happened_

_A year ago today…_

Beauty and love strike when you are alone: at the strangest times; when you never expect them to come. She had not been looking for love but it had come knocking on her door as insistent as the graceful winter snow coloring in their romance. Maybe they were both too confused to handle it at that moment: she had told herself after he had left. They were both still hiding from ghosts, ghosts of their past that haunted their hearts and minds, and both had loved with all they could muster from their hearts. Maybe it wasn't enough. 

_And I just cant forget about it_

_Or it wouldn't mean a thing_

_You went away_

_A year ago_

_Today_

After he had confided in her: that's when it started. Their love. He had needed to talk with someone and it just so happened to be her. Soon they had been exchanging words, trying to lift the burdens from their hearts to set themselves free. But she did not understand something that had occurred to her too late, after he had left her like all the others before. Maybe his liberation would mean that he couldn't face her anymore. Too ashamed by the dirty, stained snow that clouded his soul; the soul he had bared to her. Maybe he had been hoping someone would take it away from him, this burden. And after that…was what happened a year ago today. 

_Another year gone by_

_All my tears have run dry_

_Life seemed so unkind_

_A year ago today_

Straight lines are difficult to walk. Perhaps we were born intoxicated, drunk, lilting unsteadily towards the future. Love is like that. We see, she thought almost bitterly, only what was in the present. Like flying in the blinding snow, driving in the dawn fog: unable to see the consequences of loving too deeply and letting too much of their past go. Like hero and heroine, they had fought together, battling ghosts of their hearts: but in the end they were both too much for each other. 

_And how many times have I questioned myself?_

_What more could I do?_

_And how many times, have I fooled myself?_

_Over you…over you…_

He had helped her bury her past. After a night of frenzied love making, desperate to hold onto a fragment of what they believed was reality, he had helped her lay her ghosts. They had talked so much that night, about everything: their pasts, their presents…everything but their future. She could have walked out then, had she noticed. That he did not plan to include their relationship in the future. But how could she have known? How…Distant, she heard the sound of an operator crackling over the phone, announcing a GSW coming in in 6 minutes. Sighing, she tossed her black hair, grown long over the past year. A year ago…

_You gotta pick yourself up take another look_

_And dust yourself off cuz well that's too good_

_I'll say it to myself and I'll say it again_

_Love will never end_

_And though we're so far apart_

_You're forever in my heart…_

_Another year older…_

_A little bit stronger…_

**On this anniversary; **

**You're watching over me…**

_You went away_

_A year ago _

_Today…_

_You went away; a year ago…_

_Today. _

~*~ 

Dear Dave, 

I don't know exactly what happened a year ago today. I don't know why or how. But I know that you had your reasons for…doing this. I was angry at first, too angry to come when we all said goodbye. We had promised each other not to hurt each other ever again. You had told me all your secrets and we had supposedly laid our pasts to rest. But maybe that wasn't the case for you. Dave…I'm not as strong as you. It has taken me a year to understand only the surface of why you did what you did a year ago today. Why, by me laying your ghosts to rest, you were finally free to begin again. Dave, I know now you had your reasons for taking that blade and joining your past. Perhaps the past is something that we cant shake off, shake loose. It has taken me a year to realize this, but I just want you to know: I've tried to join you too many times, but you've always brought me back. I love you forever, but I know that I have to move on. Dave, I'll never forget you…somehow, I know that you are my guardian angel, watching over me in heaven. 

Love forever and ever:

Jing-Mei. 

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please r/r =) thanx…and btw it was written in one sitting…37 min to be exact…so plz don't be too harsh! lol


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